Me and a couple friends hung out the other day. I could talk a lot about how Sam fell in the duck pond or taking "grunge" photos of Sophia but I'd rather focus on just how nice everything has been. I mean I have friends again. I have people who I legitimately enjoy being around and that has been something I've been deprived of for the past couple months. I've never really been a person to stick with the same friend group for more than a year for I am rather difficult to be around. I get anxious easier than ever and I tend to be rather jealous. I'm am usually unaware of how rude and just plain mean I can be and I have a huge issue with either being too loud or quiet. Within the past three years, I have had over four friend groups that I have either drove insane to the point of ditching me or I never really made the effort to get close with them. Since last year, it seems as though every single group of friends I have had is temporary for just had the feeling that no one could ever tolerate me.
It seems like a pattern almost in the past couple years. I tend to change drastically personality and interest wise and like one of my old "friends" claimed, people change but I become a whole new person to the point where she didn't even know me anymore. Maybe I do change too quickly. I have an issue in which I just hate the Ann I am at the moment so I change myself into what I want to be. It can be confusing. I don't even know how many times I have changed within the past couple months but I have finally gotten to the point of just being OK with who I am and I don't care
if this is only temporary. I don't care if the people I love and rely on right now leave me in a couple months for right now, I am happy.
I am beginning to like myself again.
I talk to people and laugh and smile and this time it isn't artificial.
I am happy with the people I have around me and I love each and every one of my friends because as I get to know them better, I realize that they are people who care about me and I don't doubt that for a second.
When I look in the mirror, I am satisfied.
I don't look for a thigh gap or stress over my hair
I smile.
I started keeping a diary again and I put my seventh grade journal in my closet
for that year is over
and that Ann is over
In about fifth grade, I began my fixation of fashion. It started out with Seventeen for I liked that Just Bieber or someone vile like that (that I used to idolize) was on the cover once and the models wore clothing that I figured "the cool kids" wore. To be honest, the clothing I envisioned "the perfect Ann" would wear were quite banal. Print crop tops and skinny jeans or leggings. Things that showed off the "perfect body"of the perfect girl with the perfect boyfriend and perfect life. I just wanted to have that. As I have mentioned in many many other posts, I had serious self esteem issues. Not only did I find myself unbearably ugly, but also annoying, stupid, and basically just a bitch. These girls weren't any of those things to me. They had luscious long, straight, hair and I just wanted a piece of that. I wanted to be pretty like them. I used to tell my friends how gorgeous they were and how I just wanted to know what it was like to have guys think you're cute or not have to look in the mirror and hate everything I saw. Lets remember: I was eleven years old. What eleven year old should have to not feel good enough because their reflection isn't perfection? What person at any age should ever go through that? Not only were the magazines I was reading effecting my self hatred but the Internet was giving me the same false perception of what a beautiful female should look like. Websites such as tumblr (Ew I can't believe that I was ever that annoying 11 year old on tumblr) and We Heart It were showing me these gorgeous girls that I knew I would never look like. To sum up my years of fifth and sixth grade, it sucked. I couldn't look in a mirror, I hated my body, and my grades dropped for I was so caught up in this sick cycle of self loathing just because I wasn't some fucking Seventeen model. A lot has changed in the past two years. For starters, I became exactly what fifth and sixth grade Ann hated. I cut my hair short (I was obsessed with long has in fifth grade) and pierced my ears even more (I hated multiple piercings). My style became much less vile than the skimpy pieces of clothing I loved when I was eleven and twelve. Most importantly, I look up to people such as Tavi Gevinson and Hayley Williams and not some girl I saw in a magazine with pretty hair. Beauty still matters a lot to me but in the sense that it used to. Yes, I wear quite a bit of makeup and am slowly killing all the hair left on my scalp by straightening it so much but I like it like that. I don't need some "perfect" girl in some trashy magazine to show me who I want to be and as Carrie Hope Fletcher once said, "The girls in magazines don't even look like the girls in magazines.". To end on a happier note, an anonymous artist has been putting a large photoshop toolbar alongside highly edited advertisements with models in New York City subways. -Ann
*Pictures taken from tumblr
I realize how late this is but I wanted to take the time to really get all my thoughts together on the subject. About a week or so ago, Youtuber and Vine-er, Nash Grier, uploaded a video with his friends, JC and Cameron called "What Guys Look For In Girls"in which the three boys listed the things they look for in a girlfriend. They all said and agreed on many things that a potential girlfriend MUST have which I list below and put my own thoughts towards.
-You HAVE to be entertaining. "Entertain me"
This may seem rather shocking, but girls aren't here to entertain you. I agree that a relationship with a boyfriend or girlfriend should be fun and entertaining but saying that this said girlfriend must entertain you is flat out offensive.
Stay on top of me! (notify me when I should make a vine or film a video!)
What you are describing here is an assistant. Not a girlfriend. Yes I do realize that all three of you are moderately successful at such a young age and need a bit of a push to create the content you do. Your girlfriend is not your mom or assistant. Though you are dating, it is not your partner's job to "stay on top of" you.
MUST be outgoing. (later on in the video) you CANNOT be loud and annoying.
It is OK to prefer outgoing girls above shy and quiet girls but that contradiction you made about five minutes later gets complicated. What you are stating is that This said girl must be loud and fun and outgoing but she is at the same time, not aloud to be too loud and annoying. What you are looking for is not a girl. You are describing a robot that is absolutely perfect. A very very small percent of the world's population of girls is going to have this perfect balance and what you have to realize is that just like looks, a person's personality is not always going to be perfect.
Must Be Spontaneous (woohoo noise) I hate it when girls are all like ("girl voice") "Lets just sit on the couch and like talk".
First, that impression was not only rude but misogynistic. The three boys describe all the adventures they want to have with their girlfriends on a day to day basis and how they hate girls who aren't spontaneous. A little adventure is fun but expecting a girl to want to just randomly hike to Hollywood or go camping is ridiculous.
I like girls who are talented. Girls these days, are just all like "I'm just gonna marry a rich guy". They do nothing. It is cool if you are captain of the cheer team or sing (moans).
(JC) Yeah all girls are like "Just gonna get fake tits and show the guys."
This part gets me especially angry. It is great that you like girls who are talented. Who doesn't like a talented person? But there are only so many cheer team captains and singers. Also, since when were a girl's only ambition to marry someone rich and get fake breasts?
If you play hard to get, it is really hard. If you play easy then I'm all like "well she is a whore."
You're entire audience is made up of girls so how could you use such a misogynistic word? So what if I like a boy and don't want to "play hard to get"? Would that classify me as a whore? If you have the power to make such a large amount of people feel something, why would you put them down so much? I am called a whore enough and being labeled one by a boy who doesn't even know I exist hurts. Using that word is not only disgusting but abuse. Most of the girls watching your videos look up to you. Think about being called such a name by your role model.
-really bright smile!
-Freckles (Yo!!! pats knees)
-Dimples (moans)
-petite short girls
-Brunette
-Long wavy hair
-Natural look
I put these as a group because they all have something in common: no one can control wether or not they have freckles or dimples or their height. Yes you can dye your hair brown and grow it out but then that takes out the natural look. Unless a girl is born with all of these things somehow, that cancels out tons of girls on the planet.
-Dress well -No black lipstick -No lipstick at all (hard for making out) -Change up your hair -Get dressed up and dressed down -No peach fuzz! (bad for making out) -MUST SHAVE ARMS, LEGS, AND WAX LIPS -Change up your hair -Has reading glasses (all laugh) -"Natural look" These are all grouped together for they all have one thing in common-they have to do with appearance. Starting out with the "dress well" comment, how does the way I dress effect what kind of person I am? Yes, I do agree that clothing is a self expression and that some people dress kind of like the person I am but I still do not understand how a girl who dresses well will ever make the quality of your relationship higher. Moving on, not only is this potential girlfriend allowed to wear black lipstick, they can't wear any lipstick at all for it is hard to make out with also, this girl must wax her lips for the same reasons.Being only fourteen, I have only dated like two boys (and not even had a "serious relationship") but I can say that when I did date those guys, making out was not on the top of the list for everything we did. The relationship you seem to be describing seems more just like a pair of lips for you to hook up with. On top of it all, this girl must shave her arms, legs, and armpits because it is apparently disgusting if she doesn't. This is my body. Not yours. I find that shaving my legs takes up so much time that I could be spending doing something productive and shaving my arms is such a pointless task. It is fine if a girl wants to shave her body for her own reasons but never would I remove my hair for a douche of a guy. And what happened to that "natural look" you mentioned? My body naturally grows hair so in what way is natural to strip it of that? On top of it all, not only is it offensive to tell a human being that their peach fuzz and arm hair is gross, but it is abusive and a terrible thing to say to anyone no matter how disgusting you think their body hair is. -Plays video games (can't be as good as Cameron though he doesn't play them) This is explains itself I think. -Classy during the day but can get "freaky" at night -Has to be classy with friends and not one of the guys. She cannot be loud around them or be friends with their friends. What does this even mean? This said girl isn't allowed to make friends with their friends and must be quiet, classy, and ladylike. You are describing a pet not your girlfriend. -Can cook -Snowboards (hot!) -Plays sports (hottest girl sport is volleyball) The thing that bothered me about this was how they didn't want a girl who cooks or snowboards or plays volleyball because those things are interesting. They want a girl who participates in those activities because they consider it hot.
-Be yourself Here is just a question: how the fuck am I supposed to ever be myself if I am supposed to live up to all this criteria you put out for me? I like lipstick, my short straight hair, my arm and leg hair, and makeup. I don't have freckles or dimples and I am extremely tall. I suck at cooking and would probably die if I attempted snowboarding and I don't give a fuck if you think playing volleyball is hot. I hate sports. So tell me, how am I ever able to actually be myself if I will never fit the insane criteria you made for me and 300,000 other girls?
After the video was put up, I was amazed to see so many people react in so many different forms and ways. Here are some of the things that really touched me:
A slam poem made by Savannah Brown. This literally made me cry and touched me so much.
Peej Liguori showing how ridiculous these types of videos are. Complete with birthday cake.
Megan Tonjes responding to the topic.
A comment Hank Green, of Vlogbrothers, wrote on the video.
Hank is right. Nash's audience is made up of impressionable young teenage girls and putting out a message like this is terrible. The world and media is already filled with insane standards of beauty and having three fifteen year old (attractive to most) boys preaching to 300,000 girls who looked up to them is horrible. Since then, Nash did take the video down due to many angry tumblr users but as the internet works, it is impossible to delete something for good. Many people have re-uploaded it and if you want to watch it, I put it down below. All in all, I am disgusted that a boy about my age would ever create something so misogynistic.
The three of us are sitting in the corner of my bedroom. Our only light source are the multi colored fairy lights hanging off one of my walls and the glow of my laptop as I squint to read chords as Frannie and Emma pull it away from me to see lyrics. My ukulele is on my lap and I'm strumming quickly as my head bobs back and forth and my voice is mixing in with Emma and Frannie's. The three of us are singing Home or Little Talks or Vienna or some other song that was a compromise with our very diverse music tastes. I don't even exactly care what I'm belting out for I am lost in the moment. The fact that my singing is horrid and I have no idea what the hell the beat is doesn't seem to matter. We originally started out trying to assign parts of who sings when but it has gotten to the point in which we have decided to go with "sing when you feel the vibe". I constantly have to pause strumming for the ridiculously large homemade flower crown on my head is slipping off and Frannie laughs at how "chill" (as she says) we look with the headbands I made for all three of us. I like this moment. I like singing and I like my bedroom and I like the ukulele on my lap. Most of all, not only do I like Frannie and Emma, I love them.
When did I start having friends? I am sitting in the backyard of my friend John's house dressed as some stupid cat with water dripping down the tips of my hair from trying to apple bob. I look ridiculous though about all of us do too. I'm sandwiched between one of my best friends, Frannie, and a boy named Danielle who I barely ever talk to yet for some reason, I'm comfortable sitting there on the hard wicker chair eating pizza and listening to everyone else at the party share embarrassing stories. It is almost pitch black dark outside and our only light source is the lamp from inside the house. Come On Eileen by Dexys Midnight Runners is playing faintly in the background giving the entire moment a rather cinematic feel. I could seriously sit in this movie friendship circle moment for the rest of my life humming this truth forever. -Ann
The air is brisk as I walk past all the same familiar homes. The leaves crunch under my favorite black boots. You can smell Autumn in the air. I walk up the stone pathway of the elementary school I used to attend. I soon stop and sit myself down on the prickly grass. It is slowly dying just like all the other nature around me. I am just there in the front of the school cross legged as I check my phone. I am not even really sure what I am doing here. I just like the scene. I like the welcoming doors and rainbow sign that tells you when all the events are. It sure is much happier and cheery than the middle school. I pick myself up, about to leave, when I spot three familiar steps. The same stone steps I sat on every morning of fifth grade. I used to always want to be the first to sit on them so I could brag to my friends. Now, I find there to be comfort in being the last to get to school. The setting is beyond peaceful. There are no cars or shouts or even voices to break this moment. I close my eyes, thinking back to my times in fifth grade. I used to cringe at every single one but now I am at peace with these experiences. My actions are not erasable and therefor the only thing I can really do is just not care about them anymore. As Taylor Swift once said, who you are is not what you've been. This makes me think about how I should really come to peace with all those terrible memories. So what if I was a bitch a year ago? As long as I am not that person in the present, I am fine.
Vivi and I walk from her house to the small town by her old middle school. I laugh at the rumor of her taking drugs that is going around at her school. Its funny for most of the time Viv does act like she's on something. As we finally get into town, we take a quick stop at the supermarket to pick up a box of candles and two large candles that have a one and four. The kind that you see at kid's birthday parties. The Trattoria isn't as crowded as I thought it would be and as we sit down, Vivi sticks a one and four into our two slices of pizza and seven candles in each of our mozzarella balls. I can't help but think of how unimportant it is to turn fourteen. Not much is in store for me this year and yet I can't help but just be happy with everything.
Yesterday, I saw a chat with Lizzie Widicombe and Tavi Gevinson and to put it out plainly, it was the best day of my life. Tavi was not only hilarious but one of the best people I have ever met. There are even pictures of me crying after meeting her! I also got the pleasure of meeting Amy Rose and the diarist, Britany. Who we had a long and hilarious talk about scene kids. Rookie readers are also the best people ever. Viv and I met two awesome girl named Lulu and Mira who I plan on staying in touch with. Just I can't even explain how amazing this day was.
I don't understand why we still have picture day here at school. In this day and age, don't we already take enough selfies that picture day is obsolete? Why must schools have a day in which everyone gets all dressed up to have some shitty photograph where they're either A) blinking or B) Over smiling? On about the second day of school, our principal gave us a long lecture on how much eighth grade picture day means. One of his main points was that we are the main focus of the yearbook. Our pictures are the largest therefor we should prep for this legendary picture. If I could say the least, his point was complete bullshit. This post is partially bullshit too. I mean I am going on a rant about picture day...
Anyways, I decided why the hell not take the fact that Friday, Sepetember 27 was picture day. I mean I dress rather nice every single day but I went with my Jagk tee just so I could look back and either A) cringe about how terrible my music taste was or B) high five myself because my music taste was amazing back in eighth grade. I believe the second one will end up happening. As the tired photographer snapped my picture for the pointless yearbook, I tried to conjure up the most angst filled face possible. Basically, I wanted to look exactly like this:
-Ann
P.S Somehow Sinead of the online magazine, Creepy Gurl, thought that my poetry was actually good so if you want to see my piece, here is the link: My Last Memory
I walk into math class on a hot Tuesday. It is the first day of school and I'm not surprised that I am was assigned to a supplementary math class after this regular one. Though this was expected of me, I can't help but hate the fact that I am forced to take two math classes in a row. I instantly know this won't work out. The reason why I am so terrible at math is not that I don't grasp the concept well. I am unable to pay attention out of true boredom for the subject. So tell me, if I can barely sit through an hour of this subject then how will spending two hours do any good for me? I stand in the bathroom with a girl that I have never actually talked to but we both seem to find each other as good company therefor we slipped into the girl's room across the hall during the transition of periods. I fix my hair. Not that it needs fixing or anything. Just that I have no idea what else to do with myself. As the two of us walk back into class for PA or as all the teachers call "project ahead" I realize how angry and annoyed I am. I don't want to be here. Extra math won't help me and no one seems to understand that. Sticking me here with these eleven kids, make me feel shittier and stupider by the second and as childish as it sounds, I almost wanted to cry. My eleven year old sister is in accelerated math and I am not only taking the lowest level but a supplementary class. As much as I would like to tell you that I get amazing grades in English to make up for this subject, I don't. I can't handle school. I have been taking classes for eight years of my life and I haven't gotten any better. We file into our seats and I notice that everyone has the same facial expression. Dread. Anger. Sadness. None of us want to be here. I would rather take Spanish. Our teacher stands by the board acting as if the eleven of us having failed our NJASK test is a good thing. As if this class is a good thing. We all know that its not. We all know that out of the two hundred kids in our grade, we are the eleven who failed. I hate that more than anything. So yeah. Not even a week of school has passed and I already feel like shit. -Ann *Excuse the Blood On The Dance Floor stuff written on my arm and the scene kid stuff in some of these pictures. They were a joke*
Sunday was the day that the Camp Nanorimo cabins closed up. It was relieving and yet heart braking to have Camp Nanorimo end. I mean will I miss stressing myself out to write? No. Will I miss discussing with the two lovely guys I met in my cabin? In every way. The three of us decided on just going our separate ways. Not that we didn't love each other, just that we thought that just we should see what happens. See if we meet up in one of the many Nanorimo forums or get assigned to the same cabin in April. Kind of just let fate do the work. It was funny all the things we talked about. Though the cabins were mostly for discussing our novels and things along those lines, my friend who went by the name "Monkey Typewriter" or as we just called him "monkey" and I trailed off the ever so stressing subject of novelising and talked about things we liked. Music, video games, Tumblr. The two of us became pretty close and made a pact in the middle of the month to give each other verbal slaps to the face if we even said a word of giving up. We all were on each other's teams and were sticking together for this month of insanity. I ended up cutting my 50,000 word goal down to 30,000 for I had come in fifteen days late all because of camp. When I was just so frustrated and felt as if the only thing I could do was give up, one of my other cabin mates, Sky told me something that I will use for the next how ever many Nanorimos there are to come. He said: "write terribly. Write drivel. Write boring and dull characters and a menial plot. Just write, and soon the greatness will start to come." What my awesome cabin mate told me brought me to the realization that I would not walk out of Nanorimo with a novel ready for publication. This was only a rough draft and therefor we should all just write terribly and have greatness come when greatness comes. I really did wish that the other people in our cabin had participated. We had about eight campers and only the three of us talked and worked on our novels. We didn't let the lack of people stop us from having fun though! Every single mile stone we hit, we would do a dance party. This didn't mean just for yourself. We danced when Monkey hit 10,00 and still danced when Sky hit 15,000 and that memorable moment where I got to 20,000. We were all just as happy to have ourselves hit halfway and have another one of us hit a milestone. Not only was there a lot of dancing involved, but Monkey and I came up with what we referred to as "The Camp Nanorimo Theme Song" which lyrics consisted of "Just keep writing just keep writing. What do we do? WE WRITE!" sound familiar? We typed and hummed that song about five times a day each to each other. About my novel, clearly not my best work but I decided to not edit it and just keep it as a memento from an awesome summer with awesome people. Sky brought up novel swapping in which we would read each other's novels but we then just came up with keeping them to ourselves and not sharing them with anyone else. It was funny how much the three of us connected. Camp Nanorimo July 2013 was the best thing I have ever put my time to and would love to do it again. Will I talk to my virtual cabin mates ever again? I have no idea but the three of us will always have the memories of a wonderful Summer filled with virtual dancing, high-fiving, and face smacking. So now I am sitting there looking under the community section of the website and not being able to see my cabin. It is extremely painful but I guess I should just smile for it has happened. Just keep writing. Just keep writing. What do we do? WE WRITE! -Ann
Remember last week when I was frantically looking for writers yet scared to death about "taking my blog to pre-school"? I guess this is the next step. Now How Fitting isn't a blog by Ann Louise. It is a blog created by her. There is a difference. It is seriously the scariest thing ever to realize that your baby isn't really your baby anymore. Emma started Thursday and let me tell you, she did an amazing job but I just had to sit there from the sidelines of my blog and watch her post on the front of the blog. Pride for How Fitting burst inside of me yet I was scared of the future. At that moment right there and then, I have never felt more like my role model, Tavi Gevinson. This girl who was about my age began with a small blog and then just kind of slowly bloomed to the top and expanded into the best thing I have ever seen in my entire life, Rookie. Obviously, Tavi doesn't make this giant website with three articles a day alone! OK OK How Fitting has three people writing (and one editing and running) and Rookie has around sixty but you can understand my point. My biggest Tavi moment this week would have had to be when Emma (our newest member) sent me a draft of her latest post with the subject "My Thingy For The Blog :D" so I could edit and publish her piece onto How Fitting
Honorary Tavi
. Wait a second. Not only am I a writer but I am en editor. I truly am Tavi Gevinson. Well here we go. Emma's post was published (you can read it here ) and Fiona will be starting by tomorrow which I can't lie. I think I am more excited than her about this. In the end, every blog needs a Tavi Gevinson and I guess that I can at least try and be as fabulous as she is.
-Ann
Life Scouts
Since I am the lamest person in the entire world, I earned a single badge this week.
Photography
When I was younger, I used to really be into taking pictures of
mostly stupid things but still pretty cool. God I am lame. Play List This weeks playlist is mostly just made up of a combination of Sleeping With Sirens, Lights, and Pierce The Veil. I also added a single One Direction in honor of their insanely uncomfortable music video and put in "Garbage Truck" from Sex Bob-omg from my favorite movie, "Scott Pilgrim vs. The World" for I have seen it far too many times this week. Sunday Diary 26
Remember when you went to preschool and you were in the care of other people besides your parents? That was kind of how I felt this week. With putting out an offer for other interested writers to join me at How Fitting (Please email me!), I was realizing how exciting yet just plain scary that is. This very blog wouldn't be mine any longer and that is just so weird to think. I am not saying I am regretting putting this week's Friday Extra out. I am super happy about my decision and I wish more people would email me but it is just strange to see my blog "growing up". I have had a couple amazing comments and people noticing this very blog. Some of these Twitter responses include: Bridie McDonnell, Bethan Mary Leadley, Sinead (from Peppermint Whiskers), and my favorite so far being, Ruby Book. Yeah Ruby Book my favorite writer for Rookie ever. Read my blog and said she actually went through it and said she really liked it. That was probably one of the best moments of having this blog. Just imagine that person who not only do you look up to so much not only as a blogger but a person but works at the job of your dreams, telling you she actually liked something you have been working on for so long. It is insane. Another "preschool" moment of this blog is whenever I just get a pass by in the hallway from people I have never talked to at my school telling me they actually enjoyed what I have written. For an example, last night when I was checking the How Fitting inbox (for the fourth time guys, please write!), I found about the sweetest email I have gotten so far from a girl at school who I had only one class with and never talked to her (shyness took over for none of my friends were in the class and I just kind of remained silent) saying that she really liked this thing I have been doing for months. Of course I wrote back not one but TWO overly excited emails giving her the link to Rookie and expressing how freaking happy I was. Even though my baby is in preschool, I will never be one of those people who can nonchalantly take compliments. -Ann Life Scouts This month of Life Scouts is the last month of 2013! Alex Day has decided on releasing the last 100 badges and kind of making it kind of like nanorimo (without the 50,000 words) and making a mad dash for everyone to get as many badges possible. I went back into some later months and got a couple more leaving my amount badges to sixty!
Play Guitar Back at camp, we had to join these "clubs" during the day on different skills. I instantly chose music hoping that it would be just kind of like a chill session of everyone listening to Ipods and sleeping. I was So wrong. We were all began to learn new instruments. I finally got my friend Austin to teach me guitar on a five stringed old beaten up guitar that I had found in one of the closets at camp. Badass guitarist right here.
Rubix Cube So I have not ever solved a rubix cube but with the help of my friend, Michael at camp, he kind of sorta taught me somehwat how to solve one of these. Win A Trophy I in fact have two trophies. One from playing tee-ball (my best friend Vivi convinced me) in first grade and one from ballet. PLay Ukelele Third camp story! One time when there was nothing else to do, my friend at camp taught me how to play the ukelele and I ended up learning "I'm Your's". Next goal:"This Is Me" by Charlie McDonnell. In Other News I guess its time to introduce you to my babe. A.K.A my macbook that I got on Tuesday. So far, she has been decorated in stickers from the Rookie Yearbook 1 and been named "Tavi" after you know who...
Dear Blob, This week could be all wrapped up in a little box with the three words: cast, sucks, and bat mitzvah. on Monday I had a Doctor's appointment for my foot that had been aching for the past couple weeks. Even though my mom had insisted it was tendinitis for I had had it in fifth grade because of my god awful UGGS phase, I immediately denied it saying that there probably was nothing wrong with my foot. I hate it when my mom is right. With the soft cast being all too thick to be able to get through my ultra skinny jeans, the nurse supplied me with a pair of shorts. Long, navy blue, basketball shorts. While I was dying of embarrassment, my mother was laughing about how I had it coming for wearing my Urban Outfitters cat flats while walking to school. I was then given a black boot for my cast and headed out in my dreadful outfit. While thinking of ways to decorate my cast, I came out with the best thing to write across the side. In a bronze sharpie marker I scrawled "Everybody sucks yeah we all make mistakes", my favorite Hank Green quote. I then wrote "everyone sucks" on the edge of the soft cast to show off my pure hatred for my foot situation. Even though the entire day mostly consisted of pure world suck, the first ever episode of "Full Frontal" with Jack and Alex broadcast and at least gave me a little reassurance that this week wouldn't be all that bad. Tuesday I had now decorated the boot for my cast with a set of metallic markers to match the old combats that I had drawn on. I was greeted with finals reviews in about every class. This test is speeding ahead. Thursday was about the only day that I actually did anything productive. Well aside from Wednesday,in which I collected a great deal of poems for my music themed poetry anthology for English. Anyways, I finally finished the halter shirt that I'd been working on! I had two camp bar and bat mitzvahs this weekend so on Friday my mom and I went on a mini road trip down to my grandparents house to stay with them for the Pennsylvania parties. We ended up stopping at a large thrift store and coming out with a grand total of eight shirts, two pairs of pajama pants, a dress, and a charm bracelet. Do I have a thrift shopping problem? Maybe... Saturday was my friend Charlotte's bat mitzvah which I showed up in a single heel and my boot. Talk about being lob sided. The service ticked on slowly and my friend, Lily tried to do my makeup in the bathroom. I literally looked like a zombie. I then became the awkward girl carrying the suitcase for I had planned to sleep over at my friend Halle's. Being an introvert though, I ended up going back to my grandparent's house after the party though. During lunch, my camp friends and I created a little something called a "memory glass" in which we filled water glasses up with mementos from the day. Giveaways, name cards, snippets of the centerpieces. Anything we could find. We then filled the cup with water and poured hot wax over the entire thing to seal it all in. You can imagine the parent's annoyance. I then drove back to my grandparent's house in which we went out for Chinese and basically ordered the entire menu. Nice job. We then went to the nearest Barnes and Noble in which I planted myself on the floor in the Teen's section. There is just something about book stores in which I fee so comfortable. I still can't seem to understand why people at my school think that saying they don't read is cool. Suit yourself. While I'm reading, you can duck face and cry out "YOLO Swaggie". I ended up purchasing what seems to be the coolest memoir ever. "Rapture Practice" shows a lot of promise. Making fun of your own beliefs and talking about your teenage years. Anything better? Sunday morning I was suipposed to be going to my friend Shayne's bar mitzvah but my foot was aching like hell (another week of the cast) and I felt almost embarrassed to show up. Instead of going to the party, I ended up being a mush all day with my aching foot and sitting on the couch reading the book I had bought the night before (which by the way is amazing). The rest of the daywas a drive back to New Jersey with just my mom, myself, a box of Saltines, Sour Patch Watermelons, Chex Mix, and the radio blasting all the crappy tunes you could name for I couldn't seem to get my Idobi app to work. Foot casts, ruining property, and thrift shopping. How was your weekend? -Ann Play list With me having put another Diary play list in a previous post this week, this one is much shorter than most of my regular ones. I included three of the best All Time Low remixes of Weightless, Poppin Champagne, and Damned If I Do Ya. I then put a couple Never Shout Never tracks for they are becoming on of the most listened artists on my Spotify library. To top it all off, I put a couple of my favorite Hank Green songs!Sunday Diary 4 Life Scouts With May coming to an end, I have one last badge to share with you guys from Childhood month and one badge from my first week of June's "Carnival Month". I am also proud to say that I earned every single badge of childhood month! Best child ever right here!
Baking Cookies When I was younger, my family and I used to bake cookies all the time! Christmas, thanksgiving, an just when we felt like it. We did a great deal of cookie baking. Gymnastics In first grade through third, I took gymnastics classes ever week. To this day, even though I barely ever exercise, but am capable of a handstand and cartwheel. I don't think I will be trying out for the Olympics any time soon. In Other News
Remember the bikini post i did a couple weeks ago? By putting a couple of the pictures together, I created this AWESOME animation.
In addition, I appreciate this photo shoot with Jack Barakat all too much that I could not resist putting it in here:
This week has been what you call a hot mess. Three post ideas. One was published. Two are works in progress meaning, things that I have to stare at until I finally delete them for I can't stand seeing drafts in my post list. So before I begin to talk about this week, I have something MAGICAL to show you guys. So I was bored at home and scrolling through DFTBA.com because I have no better things to do (how about those 2 posts?!) and began playing around with the little music thingy about the search box and then saw the writing above the search thing. The exact words: "Looking for something specific?" with the word "looking" and being on DFTBA.com (cough cough John Green) I typed in "Alaska" just for laughs. To my surprise, under my words was the sentence "Is that you Pudge?" a Looking For Alaska reference. I am proud of John and Hank for thinking up that one. Big thanks to the Green brothers for giving me that entertainment.
Jedward
Onto relevant topics, this week has been the most frustrating music wise. My speakers were jacked up to the point where the instrumental was blasting yet the lyrics were basically a whisper. No no that it is not the worst part. The only song I could almost hear was Jedward's "Give It Up" OK OK back story about Jedward being on my Spotfiy... I have my Jedward moments... Was this God's punishment to me for being an awful new Jewish adult? Why couldn't P.O.V work? You might be asking "Why the hell did you just not listen to music if you hate the song that's playing?" well my little clueless friend, I CANNOT BLOG WITHOUT MUSIC. Thursday was a half day and you know what that means! Instead of being social, I spent those two extra hours watching Doctor Who and blogging. Go Ann. I then went to sewing in which I made multiple mistakes with the bodice of my shirt. Reasons why Ann's a fail (yay!). My family then went to school in action night at my middle school in which I dissected a frog for people to gag at including myself. We walked past the science fair where we saw some sixth grader with a robot. I'm not kidding a robot. Overachiever much? Compared to my project last year...(a mess of glitter). We then went back to the house with my sister's friend Carly and they watched "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" I found my new biggest fear. The TV is in the same room as the computer and I knew I had to work on a new post so I put my headphones and tried to get Jedward to drown out the Grinch. That things is freaking scary. I would include a picture of this terrifying creature but that would require googling it and then having to look through thousands of pictures. As Alex Day once wrote, "No one understands me." Friday was a day off for the middle school while my sister's school still had classes. TV to myself! I had exhausted all my Doctor Who episodes in my DVR and had to turn to MTV. Awkward and True Life marathon for about a couple hours... Being lame, I got bored quickly and spent the rest of the time laying in my bed hoping to fall asleep. My mom got home a couple hours and out of sympathy for how pathetic I was, she got me out of bed and my pajamas to go thrift shopping. Where I was a total idiot and wore heels. HEELS. Whose terrible idea was that? Oh yeah me. I ended up getting only "a bit" (a ton) of clothing and having to turn down a gorgeous, long, homemade dress for the reason that I seriously had nowhere to wear it.
Stop it Frodo
Saturday my parents went to a bat mitzvah and left Rachel and I at home. We spent our time doing three things: making club penguin accounts, playing club penguin, and going on neopets (I haven't been on in years) which I was WAY more exited about. I ended up naming all of my pets after youtubers: Emma Blackery, Charlie McDonnell, Alex Day, and Kristina Horner. I actually put hard work into creating them. Slow clap for Ann. Once my parents got back, we went to the extremely fancy mall to spend a Pandora gift card I'd gotten for my bat mitzvah. After looking through a catalog of adorable charms, I got a party dress in honor of this very blog (fashion). I think Pandora needs to make a charm of a girl with giant hair sitting in front of a computer with headphones to TRULY describe my blogging but this was good enough. Once we got back, I curled up with my mom's laptop and watched "50 First Dates" on projectfreetv.com. I am embarrassed to say I actually enjoyed an Adam Sandler movie. I then FINALLY finished a couple posts and the whole no music thing was running my Patience thin. This lead to about ten minutes of me beating up my speakers to make it work. Later on, my parents and I ended up watching "The Hobbit". Pretty mush day. Anyways, I remember my dad reading me this book back in about third grade but once the movie started I barely remembered anything except for two things: there we tow dwarfs named Fili and Kili. Nice job Ann. I found the entire movie a little distracting to the fact that Frodo Baggins who had about six lines and two minutes in the first scene was absolutely gorgeous and I spent the entire duration of the film hoping appear out of nowhere. But Kili was a little attractive and I could almost deal with Frodo not being in every single scene.
Today I spent my time reading through different blogs and found one of my new favorites: Peppermint Whiskers. Then scavenged through Tumblr for a total fangirl moment in which I found Dan tackling Phil. Is this how I spend my time? I then freaked out when Dan and Phil interviewed (my girlfriend) Perrie Edwards. I just realize dhow thirteen year old girl that sounded... I then went sneaker shopping. Whoo hoo. God I hate sneakers. I then reevaluated All Time Low's "Come One Come All" and realized that I found the song that describes me when I listen to Z100. Seriously that song is about killing a DJ all for the reason that his play list sucks. Play list "So go on and lock me up you better throw away that key before I find out where you broadcast from cause your play list is killing me." -ATL This week's play list is a bit different than most of my other Sunday Diary ones with artists such as Taylor Swift, and Luke Cutforth being added to the mix because even though I myself have been listening to them for forever, I though you guys would enjoy them now. I also put Lex Croucher's "Taking Back The Covers" music and a couple songs from Disney's "Tangled". There are also songs by R5 and The Ready Set for they are my guilty pleasure bands. Then the Pokemon theme song is just for laughs... Sunday Diary 2 Life Scout Badges I am EXTREMELY proud to say that I earned every single badge this week for childhood month! Ride A Bike The first time I ever rode a bike was in the summer before fifth grade. Before, I used to ride my Razor scooter EVERYWHERE. I seriously could ride that scooter at full speed. Anyways, one boring summer day, I found an old bike in our garage and kind of taught myself to ride. I don't regularly ride bicycles but if you sat me down on one, the chances of me falling on my face would be slim.
Skip Rope I don't exactly remember the first time I ever skipped rope, but I am able to do it extremely fast and I used to have some crazy goal to do 100 skips...
Tree Climbing My family and I used to go to this park right by the train station when I was little and there were these trees that were perfect trees for climbing. They were low to the ground but got higher as you climbed around the branches. My sister and I used to have races up them! Trampolining Back in fifth grade, when my family was trying to sell our house, we had a trampoline right in our backyard and we had the same one in our new yard for the Summer but had to take it down due to insurance issues. Meh. I am rather proud to say, I am capable of flipping on a trampoline!
Yo-yo When I was in fourth grade, my dad went through a Yo-Yo phase in which he collected tons of yo-yos and I think even went to a convention... with so many of these laying around I taught myself to properly spin a yo-yo.
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