Sunday Diary: Hello Thurman! Its Your First Day Of School

I walk into math class on a hot Tuesday. It is the first day of school and I'm not surprised that I am was assigned to a supplementary math class after this regular one. Though this was expected of me, I can't help but hate the fact that I am forced to take two math classes in a row. I instantly know this won't work out. The reason why I am so terrible at math is not that I don't grasp the concept well. I am unable to pay attention out of true boredom for the subject. So tell me, if I can barely sit through an hour of this subject then how will spending two hours do any good for me? I stand in the bathroom with a girl that I have never actually talked to but we both seem to find each other as good company therefor we slipped into the girl's room across the hall during the transition of periods. I fix my hair. Not that it needs fixing or anything. Just that I have no idea what else to do with myself. As the two of us walk back into class for PA or as all the teachers call "project ahead" I realize how angry and annoyed I am. I don't want to be here. Extra math won't help me and no one seems to understand that. Sticking me here with these eleven kids, make me feel shittier and stupider by the second and as childish as it sounds, I almost wanted to cry. My eleven year old sister is in accelerated math and I am not only taking the lowest level but a supplementary class. As much as I would like to tell you that I get amazing grades in English to make up for this subject, I don't. I can't handle school. I have been taking classes for eight years of my life and I haven't gotten any better. We file into our seats and I notice that everyone has the same facial expression. Dread. Anger. Sadness. None of us want to be here. I would rather take Spanish. Our teacher stands by the board acting as if the eleven of us having failed our NJASK test is a good thing. As if this class is a good thing. We all know that its not. We all know that out of the two hundred kids in our grade, we are the eleven who failed. I hate that more than anything. So yeah. Not even a week of school has passed and I already feel like shit.
-Ann
*Excuse the Blood On The Dance Floor stuff written on my arm and the scene kid stuff in some of these pictures. They were a joke*

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Skool Sux from annlouise11 on 8tracks Radio.

Back To School Playlist

Ann's Note- September

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Summer flew by all too fast and if you haven't already started school, classes will be starting soon (Fiona's school is already started). September can kind of be known as one of the worst months ever. I mean not only do you have to switch gears from sleeping half the day and staying up all night but September is extremely awkward. You haven't seen more than half of these people in a good couple months! To help you get through this crazy transition and feel you a little less nervous about school (says the girl who is freaking out), The How Fitting girls got together to make a "Back To School Week" starting Friday the sixth where for that Friday Extra and the rest of the week, the three of us will be putting out back to school themed posts.  I want to take this long break as a time to become a "better Ann". I am not saying that I want to become a WHOLE new person but work on the things that I don't like about myself so I can finally focus on the things that I love about myself. I don't want to be as quiet. I don't want to hold myself back from doing things that I want to do and saying things that I want to say just because of my horrible shyness. Yes, I am aware that my anxiety and shyness aren't just going to poof away but unlike last year, I want to work on this problem of mine instead of just being miserable about it and not doing anything. So here we are. A little bit more than a week until I become a big scary eighth grader. Though September can be the month where I probably get the most anxiety, I am somewhat excited to have a place to show off my outfits. Good luck you guys!

-Ann

P.S I am so sorry that this past week was a little bit of a mess! Fiona just moved back to America (yay!) and also started school so didn't have time to write up posts with so much going on. This past Thursday, Emma was on vacation and on Monday, I couldn't write an outfits post for I was on a surprise trip to the beach for the weekend with Vivi.