Sunday, October 23, 2016

Try to Play It Cool But I Still Love You (PWR BTTM)

After months of waiting (since August precisely), Anh, Ben, and I finally saw PWR BTTM at Villain in Brooklyn on Friday (outfit post here) and with complete confidence, I'd have to say it was one of the best shows I've seen (a close second to The Front Bottoms duh)- it was honestly slightly odd since I hadn't been to a concert since last December, when I saw Frank Iero and The Celebration (one of the worst experiences I've ever had at a show), and after going through that phase in my freshman (and early sophomore) year of basically seeing a band every week, not seeing anything for nearly a year was a wild break.
Photo taken by Anh right after we got in- I remember being fourteen and fifteen and me and my friends would camp out for hours (like the time I waited in line for NINE hours to see All Time Low) outside the venue just to get the golden barricade. Just because I *must* sound pretentious and reflective at some point within this, this show was such a contrast from most of the emo shit I saw previously- for one there were was a lack of pushing teenagers trying to get to the front (that will not be missed). ANYWAYS, even though the three of us arrived fifteen minutes before doors opened, we ended up being right up against the stage (and lucky for me, right in front of the speaker- the ringing has still not left my ears).
                                        My loves, Ben and Anh, minutes before Lisa Prank.
The hypeman of the night was the "IM CIS" box- another really wonderful and beautiful point of Friday night was how gay everything was. I hadn't really been to a concert that was so reflective and made me so thoughtful about myself (whoa that sounds tacky and pretentious). In other words, I love my gay self and I love my gay friends.
Lisa Prank went on first and closed on a cover of "Dammit" by Blink-182- no matter what show I go to, I'll never be able to escape that middle school emo phase and that's partly because no one has fully escaped their emo phase either.

Vundabar was incredible as expected- Brandon was in front of me the whole time (god is he beautiful) and I fell a lil in love.
PWR BTTM !!! They opened with "West Texas" and I haven't felt so happy and hype and wonderful all at the same time- though my past concert experiences have definitely varied, there's definitely that same feeling of appreciation and love for whoever is on the stage and that's pretty golden.

                                       Love of my life, Liv Bruce, during "I Wanna Boi"

While Ben and Liv were switching instruments, Ben ending up falling literally behind the stage- all quite surreal and slapstick.
Nicholas being super beautiful and pretty- I ended up standing right in front of him and he snuck us smiles and side comments throughout the night.

The night closed off with a chant of "NO MAN WILL EVER LOVE ME THE WAY I NEED HIM TO" and encore with "House in Virginia"- all of PWR BTTM is so talented and I am literally in awe after seeing such an incredible band goddamn. '

*side note concert story: this entire night got me thinking of all the ridiculous things that have happened at concerts (which are especially funny since all of these take place with emo Ann from 2-3 years ago) and for some reason, the most comical and surreal and horribly emo memory I could come up with was the time I saw Pierce The Veil and Sleeping With Sirens on Valentine's Day 2015 (which is just a complete joke within itself) and Kellin fucking Quinn tells us the reason why he couldn't fully open his eyes was because he'd "just smoked a fuckton of weed" due to his valentine not being present. I'm not sure why that's what immediately came to mind but...

Saturday, October 22, 2016

All The Boys Say They Don't Love Me (but i know theyre lying)

 On Friday, I finally finally (finally) saw one of my favorite bands, PWR BTTM, at Villain in Brooklyn (experience post going up tm!!) and as my two best friends and I discussed, if there was ever a time to dress truly to the nines, it was this. As all my ensembles go, quite a lot of deliberation and outfit changes went into this one before I decided on something I not only looked truly queer in but also felt comfortable wearing (meaning i wouldn't have to look at my reflection every .2 seconds or ask for constant validation). Anyways, this outfit got me through the night beautifully- I felt like the true gay princess I am !!

-Top: Christian Dior (I s2g I got it thrifted for $4 w/o seeing the tag until days later- I vommed a lil-whata steal) 
- Skirt: H&M
-Belt: Thrift
-THE shoes: Buffalo Exchange (I got these 2 years ago because my shoe broke while in the city and haven't had such a fitting event to wear them to until this)
-Necklace: made by Viv's mom for my 17th (it says "dingus" on it- very fitting)

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Sweet Seventeen

Yesterday, I turned 17!! That's so wild considering that when How Fitting was founded, I was at the ripe age of 13 with no actual sense of self (not that I fully have one now, it's improvement.). It really just is amazing how oddly different and similar I am from the seventh grade version of myself imprinted on the Internet. Forever. Ugh.
Seventeen is a rather odd and awkward age to turn. First off, there's so much in between. It feels like I've been in between forever. In the words of Francine Pascal, "I am seventeen. The good things about seventeen is that you’re not sixteen. Sixteen goes with the word sweet, and I am so far from sweet." and I take some sort of connection with that- a lot of being seventeen is no longer being sixteen. I'm on the cusp of legal adulthood and I'm nervous and excited and happy to just kind of hang back and be seventeen and not sixteen and do adult things such as driving a car (horrible at it. terrible. never good idea.) yet fully shying away from anything with unappealing responsibility. 
Along with this is the copious amounts of media surrounding the age of seventeen. I mean if we want to bring it back to my infamous emo days, there's an All Time Low song that says, "stay seventeen" and for some reason I was like "god I really can't wait to be seventeen because of this shitty song"- with magazines titles and lines from Abba songs, seventeen seemed like some sort of club to thirteen year old Ann. Television and music and film and photography made sixteen a rather pressured year for me to constantly have fun and be spontaneous and "be sixteen" be sixteen. be sixteen. And I don't want to feel constantly like I'm wasting some "precious" year (I'll honestly forget in twenty years) whenever I'm not be cinematically worthy. That's a boring and exhausting way to live. 
I sobbed the night before my birthday. I was organizing my DVD collection and fantasizing over what I'm spending my first paycheck on (as in a JOB. I have a job that PAYS. How crazy is that??) and something stupid triggered it like my phone charger breaking or not being able to find the lens cap to one of my cameras and I just broke down. I love birthdays. I hate my birthday. Similar to my feeling of pressure to have a grand ol' time at sixteen years old, I always feel like my birthday has to be some sort of magical, wonderful, day and I hate that. I hate expectations. Along with this was the actual fear of aging. It feels like I've fast forwarded through everything and now here I am and I don't really know what to do with that. 
The actual daytime piece of my birthday was quite plain and simple and average. It was Kol Nidrei (eve of Yom Kippur) that night and so my parents (who were observing the holiday) did not go out to dinner with me, which I was quite emo over at first but in the end, there was really no point in getting upset over trivial things like this. I shot a couple of photos of my grand entrance into the Great Seventeen Club (aka photographic masturbation) on my stuffed animal covered bed. I ended up being quite typical and watching The Naked Brothers Band Movie on the tv I stole off the side of the road that one time   as I do for every other milestone of my life. 
me holding up one of Ben's gifts
Actual night of the big one seven: I cried. Multiple times. I ended up going out for burritos with Anh and Ben and sitting in the park dipping chips into rice and beans and reading through mixtape playlists and eating sponge cake and being upstairs in my bedroom playing guitar and hanging upside down off my bed. All very surreal.

bedroom scene 
Overall, I'm not sure where I'm at with birthdays. I guess I've reconciled the birthday curse and understand the lack of perfection within them and the triviality of it all. In the use of a cliche, overused, Bradbury quote, "I'm seventeen and I'm crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane." I hope to take this year to become less impulsive, twitchy, and restless and all the more. 
sweet 17: gifts

Monday, October 3, 2016

NYFW SS17: The Outfits

SS17 New York Fashion Week has come and gone yet for some reason, I just never got around to showcasing my outfits until now. Anyways, Fashion Week was lovely and surreal as always, I ended up spending one of the nights wandering around chinatown with my best friend (who also took these photos!!), drinking bubble tea and gushing about how much I love them.

Though I was supposed to cover VFiles x Kye's show for Mimp, I ended up not getting past the elitist gates of the Soho location (despite literally being on the list and confirmed on multiple occasions). I did get to view Katie Gallagher's "Eclipse" however which was magical and beautiful and honestly the best line I actually got to see in person.

Top: H&M
Choker: Ebay
Skirt: TopShop
Boots: Docs

I went for a more casual look for this day due to my no actual obligation to see anything (Mimp was down for a couple runways but my second day was actually quite laid back). I ended up spending most of my time gushing over cute skater boys in Soho and Open Ceremony. Very productive.

Top: thrift
Skirt: TopShop
Shoes (not pictured): Birkenstocks
Choker: Forever21 (I know.)

Anyways, I'm already missin Fashion Week and the almost dystopian feel of it. I'm currently listening to the Shrek 2 soundtrack however which is dystopian within itself.

Sunday, October 2, 2016


Hey. Things have been off and on and strange and stressful and so much is different, including my appearance, yet the same. That's quite odd since the last piece I wrote was a little less than a month ago but five inches of hair in a trashcan later, I look a little like this:
I don't believe I've ever looked more gross and more beautiful. I look much much more healthy however and I am! Junior year has been kind of wild within its first month and the wildest part is that this is the best I've been doing in school. Ever. The thing is I love going to school, I'm just never good at it. I hope to stay in school for the rest of my life honestly.

As the school year started, I've been shedding my summer with it and this sadly meant my departure from ethantheboyfriend. We left it on incredibly good terms which is rather out of the ordinary for me. Most of my breakups end in a bout of tears followed by months of pent up resentment towards each other. I rehearsed my breakup speech over and over again too and none of it went as planned, I hoped for more anger. I know how to work with anger as opposed to understanding. Anyways, I'm doing good after this ending; there are some random bouts of emptiness that are all superficial however. I'm doing good. I'm doing good. I've been around the block with breaking up (only in the corner of being the instigator however), and have just been focusing on myself which sounds corny, but in essence is quite nice. Thinking bout writing an actual blogpost about this though due to the various relationships How Fitting has encountered and how seemingly cavalierly they seem to end.

Going off that topic, I've finally decided I've got to start writing on this at least once every two weeks again. I know I know I say this over and over again but I honestly need to. In all honestly, How Fitting has been the only real constant in my life (exaggeration: I mean my hobbies/work) since I was thirteen years old and that seems a shame to drop. There's so many holes from when I dropped this site during my mass of depression last year and that's not particularly cool!
What have I been doing what have I been doing: Mad Sounds has been a big thing recently. Meaning I'm writing for them every week which is *crazy*. It's a lot. Along with that is my recent post on Written Citizen about Christian Siriano SS17 because OHMYGOD I went to fashion week and didn't even talk about it (which I do every year but somehow didn't get around to ???) !! My NYFW outfits (which is long long overdue) should be up tomorrow. This is a high level of disorganization I'm going crazy over.
Anyways, I've missed this space as always. Let's see how this goes.

(also hope this signature change is appreciated due to the amount of MySpace aesthetic websites I had to visit to make this)

Sunday, September 4, 2016

She's Been Gone Since That Summer

As the Summer has been winding down, so has the times I've actually left the house (procrastinated summer assignments are slowly killing me). Enjoy me celebrating and documenting the last hoorahs of the summer before my junior year (whoa that's wild).
roller disco!!
Pier One rink in Brooklyn with my sister- I was just getting good when I fell (I felt it for the next 2 weeks. fun.)
Me looking actually presentable in SoHo after a good three hours of skating. 
Me and Fee!! The true love of my life came back to the city after over a year- a lot of gossip and coffee at The Bean was shared. It's incredible to think the two of us have been friends for nearly four years and how weird and wonderful it has been to see the two of us grow up and into ourselves. 
Ethan The Boyfriend in Dizzy's after returning from Amsterdam. Beautiful as always, complete with a beard. 
very very horrible photo of brooklyn's hottest couple. 
kind of hilariously horrible photo of me caught in the rain after seeing a movie. Photo and jacket credit to ethantheboyfriend. 
After being separated for far too long, I was reunited with my best friends ever, Ben and Anh. Here is a picture of me and Ben basically creating Cole Sprouse's greatest work. 

Ben in Washington Sq Park looking beautiful as always. 

Actual angel in my life, Anh, reacting to a keychain from Ben that reads "Bahama Mama"

Anh being a pixie in the digital age. 

RIP Summer 2016. 
*title from the only good song ever, "Summer Girls", by LFO.