Friday, December 27, 2013

Friday Extra: Still Not Asking For It

I absolutely hate it when people start rants off with "This is a rant about...." I just had to put that out there for I seriously had no other way to start this. Lately, many people at my school have told me that I show my boobs off way too often or that my leggings are too tight or my heels are too high. Personally, I disagree, but that isn't the point. The other day, as I walked by a group of sixth graders, one of them whispered to another one of their cunt friends,
"It is as if she is asking to be raped." referring to my low cut Pierce The Veil tank top. I am not going to take something some ignorant sixth grader said as extremely hurtful. That isn't the point either. If she had just called me a slut or whore or any other offensive (and disgusting) word of her choice, I would have been completely fine with the rude comment and have moved on with my life. No, she said that I was fucking ASKING to be raped. I seriously can't describe how awful that is that someone would think is OK to claim.
source
For once in my fourteen years of life, I have felt good about my body. Ever since about the age of ten, I have either felt too fat or skinny or tall and have classified myself as ugly. Finally, I can come to peace with what I have and feel confident walking around with something that is a little more revealing than I normally wear. Was I strutting down the hallway saying "Hey! Who wants to rape me?". Of course not! So what gives this girl that right to tell her snobby friends that I want to be raped?
One of the main things I was disgusted by the comment was how casually she talked about rape. She being a sixth grader, may not have been exposed to these topics as much as someone older than her has. She may not realize how serious and tragic rape is and how this really isn't something you should be saying casually towards others.
Also, what happened to the fact that everyone has feelings? About every child learned in preschool that if you don't have something nice to say don't say it and that everyone has feelings. Even that eighth grader walking down the hall in the low cut shirt. This girl didn't know me at all and I didn't know her. Does she know about how many times I have cried in front of the mirror about my body? How about the amount of times I have felt so insecure about myself that I have had to wear a hoodie over something I was wearing for I felt too ugly? I don't think so. She doesn't know that I have respect for myself and that I am, in fact, a feminist who believes that people should wear whatever the hell makes them feel good because it doesn't matter how much you show as long as you are happy with yourself and feel beautiful. On top of all that, her comment is flat out invalid. You can't ASK to get raped. Rape is a one sided situation so if I wanted to be raped, it technically couldn't be classified as that.
To finish this all off, I just really hope that people will stop saying these terrible things to each other. Rape isn't a thing to say casually about another person no matter what the hell they are wearing. No one ever asks to be raped. I don't care how short their shorts are or how low cut their tops can be. I seriously hope that one day, this sixth grader will say something as disgusting as what she told me, to the wrong person. I am not saying this so her life gets ruined or something crazy like that. Just at one point, she is going to learn her lesson that saying such awful things about people isn't going to get her very far. I am also going to clear up before people begin going insane, I did not write up this post so I could trash talk this girl and to make her feel bad (I doubt she will even read this). I made this post to show anyone else who has ever said that someone is asking to be raped how terrible that is. Thanks guys.
-Ann

2 comments :

  1. I totally agree.
    I use total in a literal sense here, I really do agree with everything you said.
    It's really important to raise public awareness about this, I think.

    A friend of mine was recently sexually harassed, in a club, after a guy had slipped her roofies.
    I was I was out clubbing with her and thank god that I was, because I beat that boy black and blue.

    My friend was wearing a short skirt and very high boots, but she is happy with her boyfriend and would never ask for sexual contact with another guy - not while she is in a relationship with someone.

    She was not asking for it.
    Just as her would-be-rapist did not ask for a good beating.

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