Sunday, April 6, 2014

Things Are Shaping Up To Be Pretty Odd

   I want to tell you about one of my new favorite memories of these past couple months. It's Friday and we are walking through the parking lot to a playground where not many people from our school go. It's warm and Emma is playing "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" for her boyfriend, Eli, has never heard it. I don't really pay attention to myself for the scenery is so loud. Sophia and Sam discuss going under the bridge after the park and John disagrees and asks what I think. I don't really care. I'm just happy to be with these people that I could do anything. We reach our destination and Sam, Sophia, and I sit on top of picnic tables watching John, Eli, and Emma attempting gymnastics in the field next to the playground. At one point, I jump over the small fence separating us and teach John how to do a handstand.
   We go on the tire swing and run through the field and lay down and watch a group of guys play football. My entire outfit is covered in dirt from when Sophia and I ran backwards in a game to catch John and my extensions are out. If this had happened three weeks before, I would be freaking out over my appearance but I couldn't care less right now in this moment because I'm happy and the people around me are too. 
    We eventually leave and walk over to Sophia's house for Sam fell in the duck pond and needs a change of clothes. John, Victor, and I sit on the couch waiting and we then walk over to John's where we play catchphrase and eat chips in his kitchen. 
   The tiny details don't exactly matter though for this entire experience is something I haven't felt in what feels like months. I realize how stupid and ultimately lame it must sound that I am getting excited over hanging out with a couple friends on a Friday but my God does this mean so much more to me. I remember one of the best parts of a book I have ever read was in Forgive Me Leonard Peacock by Matthew Quick. It isn't exactly important what the direct quote (I would put it in but Vivi has my copy) or the context is just the piece in which Leo describes the best night of his life as feeling high and puts it that maybe the reason why so many people older than him experiment with drugs just to get the same wonderful feelings he was getting that night. That day I felt that high. That warm Friday afternoon made me me realize I don't have to be that girl who cares so much about her appearance or has to have a lot of friends to be "cool" because I've got some wonderful people surrounding me. 

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