The past couple days have been spent in John's basement as the TV plays some awful reality show and I sit in my permanent spot on the leather couch. John came back from camp about five days ago and I have seen him twice since. The first time was just the two of us- it was nice as we ate pasta at his kitchen counter and then spent the rest of the evening watching "Wife Swap" and then moving onto "Bet On Your Baby" since I didn't believe it could actually be a show (those forty minutes proved me wrong). We then hung out again on Sunday; Sam and Sophia were there and we ended up walking down to town, ordering a pizza, and bringing it up to the park outside his house as we played around with Samantha's new Polaroid and heard stories from John's camp.
I think what I worry about too much is that people who will probably never give a shit about will like me. I drive myself crazy trying to be some person who's impressive and really out of what I'll ever be and end up hating myself in the end since I never get the conclusion I wanted and I believe that is one of the many things I will have to eventually solve but at the moment, I don't need to worry about someone else loving me or thinking I'm cool because I've got some pretty amazing friends that I can't imagine I ever deserve.
In October, I made a post where I showed you guys some of the pieces I've done in my first collage book and since I've finished that one in May, I've made a couple collages I'm pretty proud of.
My dad being a mapmaker, had a bunch of old atlases that I stole for awesome backgrounds.
This is one of my all time favorites.
(quote from "Fall Into These Arms" by New Politics)
Wow it has been quite awhile since we've had a stable schedule but a lot of things have been holding me back from creating content from simple set backs such as "Criminal Minds" finally being added to Netflix to barriers such as just feeling too shitty to even try and make anything. You see, a lot has happened within the past few weeks such as being incredibly lonely due to all my friends being away and when I'm left alone for too long, things get bad and my mind begins to go back to the way it was. I also have just felt so useless lately like nothing I do will ever make an impact on anything which I believe has to do with my anxiety and the need to always be productive. I think another thing that is holding me back is fear; so much has been changing recently that I feel as though I can barely keep up with myself and the thought of losing control again scares me to no extent. So here I am, having finally walked out of my own mind for the first time in awhile to explain my disappearance and maybe even fess up to my addiction to questionable dramas and eating chocolate chips in my bed with the warmth of my laptop radiating on my skin.
Moving on, I have done some things in the past couple weeks of summer that I never got around to sharing with you guys so I guess there is no better time than now to share some of my "forgotten" Summer "adventures".
In late June, John, Emma, and I went down to a playground of an elementary school in our town and took some qt. 4000 photos because I enjoy snapping pictures to prove I actually do have friends on here.
John on the monkey bars
I somehow convinced John taking pictures of me was a good idea because I felt rather cute that night and felt the need to document that.
Again, look at how cute I am. Bask in the adorableness that was Ann LeMonnier that night.
I feel as though half of the things my friends and I do are ironic including this stupid pose.
Needless, to say, John and I are rather adorable
Emma thought it was a good idea to take photos on the bench hence these shots.
Wow that was a short list of adventures. You've been you, I've been me, hopefully I get my shit together this week. See you Monday.
P.S this is super irrelevant but you seriously need to listen to Bribry and Candice's cover of "I Miss You" by Blink182 because it is the most gorgeous thing ever and it will make me very happy because we can have a chat on how absolutely beautiful it is (just listen to the second verse sung by Candice- I swear you'll be hooked)
Last Monday, I saw Kingsfoil's tour with Say We Can Fly, Rookie Of The Year, and Red Letter Days at The Knitting Factory in Brooklyn and I have to say, it was one of the best shows I have ever been to. As most of you know, all these bands aren't the most well known and therefor the crowd was extremely small (I swear there were 50 people in there at most) which I loved since the entire show was extremely intimate. With them being so unknown and not having to worry about crazy fans, the bands were just walking around the place. For starters, a girl I met in line wanted to bring her professional camera in but the venue wouldn't let her so Kingsfoil (the headlining band) came out of nowhere and invited her to take pictures of them, slapped a press pass on her wrist, and let her bring the camera in. Also, I am not kidding when I tell you that right when I walked into the room Braden fucking Barrie was just standing there. My sister and I had made sure to be in front of the line so we were one of the first inside and I instantly ran up to talk to him. The two of us ended up taking a photo (it is the first picture I have ever taken with a "famous"- I use that word loosely- person that I actually like how I look)
Since the doors opened half and hour early, Rachel and I spent a lot of time just saving our spots by the stage (we were pressed up against it!) and "merching it up" (as Rach said). Since they were super cheap and it was Rachel's first concert, we ended up buying "Stay Cozy" tanks that Braden signed (he was standing by the merch table for a lot of the time) and a Say We Can Fly signed poster (I will need to find room for it on my wall). I also snapped a photo of Rachel and Braden- even though she was a little shy, I insisted.
8:00 finally came along and the first opening act, Red Letter Days, got on. Though I'm not familiar with the band (I don't think anyone was), they were pretty rad. The set up was super interesting too- the lead singer was on bass, there was an insane guitarist, and the drummer basically ran the entire show. They played about seven songs (including an awesome mash up of classic rock songs) before making room for the next set, Rookie Of The Year.
The guitarist was insanely good- after their set ended, my sister and I kept trying to get his attention for his pick.
(Let's not even mention how cute the lead singer was)
Rookie Of The Year was extremely acoustic-y and though I knew zero of his songs, I took some kewl pictures and selfies with Rachel
Though this was Kingfoil's tour, it seemed as though most of the audience was here for Say We Can Fly which is unbelievably better live. I loved the interaction Braden had with the crowd (we were basically all just pressed up around the stage so it was easy to talk to us) and how he explained that he didn't really have a set list so kind of just let us scream out songs we wanted to hear. He opened up with "Intoxicated I Love You" (I went through a phase in which that was all I listened to) then followed up with "Love Note For A Rainy Day" since everyone wanted to hear something off the Dandelion Necklace EP. After that, he played "Scars" which actually got me crying. Before the show when I met Braden, I told him that he was a big influence on my end to self harm and he ended up giving me a huge hug and telling me he felt honored to hear that so "Scars" was an insanely emotional song to hear live. He then asked if it was OK to play a cover (followed by a lot of screaming from the crowd) and ended up doing "Lego House" by Ed Sheeran. Braden then went on to taking a vote from the crowd for either "The Poet" or "Heaven Is Hell" and ended up doing the second one. Then after persuasion from the crowd, went for "Dandelion Necklace" (ugh don't even get me into how pretty it was live) and ended with "Bruise My Bones". He then said goodbye to us all (not really though since he walked around the venue for the rest of the night).
"We are at the Knitting Factory so I guess we're making some sweaters tonight"
Kingsfoil finally came on after that and though I have only been listening to them for about a month, I absolutely love them and was so excited to see the band live. Though I can't remember exactly how many songs they played, I do recall "What Your Mother Taught You", "Give It Up", and "Grapevine Valentine". OK I realize how stupid it is that I love their biggest hot so much but I had a serious obsession with it and hearing the song live meant a lot to me.
So as I said, the fifth song they played was "Grapevine Valentine" and I was over the moon when it came on to the point where I was screaming it really obnoxiously. Since there was barely anyone there, Kingsfoil could hear me pretty clearly and therefor I got Jordan Davis' attention and we locked eye contact for a good ten seconds. I'd like to think he looked over at me because I was one of the only people singing along but it probably was for he wanted me to shut the fuck up.
All in all, this night really made me realize how much I appreciate small bands and venues like this for the kind of experience could have never happened with a big time band and large crowd.
